Lingham Tantra Massage

A lingam massage is a mindful tantra and therapeutic bodywork practice that focuses on the male genital area (the word lingam comes from Sanskrit and means “sword of light”). It is not about performance or achieving a specific outcome, but about relaxation, awareness, and connection with bodily sensations. Compared with a standard erotic or sensual massage, the lingam style is about intimacy and connection. Both with oneself and with the partner. In traditional tantra practices, there is a pleasure receiver and a pleasure giver. Like its female form, yoni, the lingam massage is all about being the ‘pleasure receiver’ in a tantra sense. There is no pressure to perform, be a certain way, achieve orgasm or provide pleasure to the partner. This often heightens the sexual experience by taking away these pressures and expectations and enables a space where experiencing is the goal in itself.

In a professional or therapeutic context, a lingam massage is approached slowly and respectfully, with clear consent and boundaries. It can support stress reduction, body awareness, emotional release, and a healthier relationship with touch and pleasure. The emphasis is on presence, safety, and tuning in to what the body feels—rather than “doing” or striving for anything.

My clients are always in control, and the experience is guided by comfort, choice, and communication.

Like its male counterpart, the yoni massage is a gentle, mindful tantra practice that focuses on the vulva and pelvic area (the word yoni comes from Sanskrit and broadly means “sacred cave”). Women are socialised quite differently from men, with female sexuality and pleasure poorly understood, appreciated and accepted. Because of this, many women have difficulty receiving, accepting and experiencing pleasure and orgasm and have internal biases that mean they tend to focus on pleasuring their partner. Expectations around performative sex and pressure to orgasm from their partner also mean that orgasm can be difficult to achieve.

In a yoni massage, it is not about sexual performance or achieving orgasm, but about relaxation, awareness, and reconnecting with the body in a safe and respectful way. Because of the lack of expectation or pressure, many women find it easier to relax in a safe tantra space, and are actually more likely to experience orgasm (even though this is not the goal).

Yoni massage helps many women come to a better understanding of themself, their sexuality and their relationship with their own bodies, which creates positive changes for their relationships and sex lives. Like the lingam style, the massage is approached slowly, with emphasis on safety, boundaries, consent and communication. It can support mental health, increased body awareness, emotional release and healing from trauma, shame, negative experiences, conservative upbringing and disconnection held in the pelvic area. The emphasis is on presence and listening to the body’s responses, rather than pushing toward any outcome.